I love Rock and Roll

put another $100.00 in the gas tank so I can
go do it
again!

I was invited to come and play

 electric bass

with a couple of musicians I know.
D the guitar player.
R the drummer.
Both rockers.
They dont play ANY country.
Dont even know any country.
(I love all music,
 but I am a rocker
 1st and foremost :-)
Both my age, both good musicians.
I have known them both for many moons.

FINALLY!

God, its been a long long long long time,

since
 I've
rocked.
Rock and Roll

 is truely an art form.

Music itself is so amazing.

I love it.
Big bone.

Its midnight blue, but looks black in this picture.

You can kinda see the blue in this one.

I was reminded how physical being a bass player is.

That thing is heavy.

I was bound and determined to load my stuff

my self. 

My amp

 (it is really Justin's amp, he picked it out and bought it)

has one, 12 inch speaker.

Its heavy, but not THAT heavy. 

I CAN DO IT.

When I lifted it and leaned back to put it in the back of my truck,

I had a self-chiropractic moment.

crack..............

I sucked in my breath

 and

 looked wide-eyed into the sky

and 

waited for the pain.......

but it never came.

IT  FELT  FAN-FREAKING-TASTIC  !!!

Oh my Lord.

 I moved a little slower with the rest of my stuff

because I 

just

knew

my back

would have to start hurting soon.

It always hurts.

It has felt better ever since.

:-)

"......but if you try sometimes.....

....... you get what you need"

True Mick.

We played:

stuff we made up,

 and prized picks from:

Grand Funk Railroad

Jimi Hendrix

Pink Floyd

AC/DC

Santana

Bob Dylan

Lynyrd Skynrd

Stevie Ray Vaughn
Yes

Buddy Holly

and a bunch I don't really know about.

It was so much fun.
Its like riding a bike
once you get going.
I have always loved the raw sound of a trio.
bass, guitar, and drums.
Simple, raw, and clean.
Same way I like my food.
My 'rig'
' blue'em away'
haha
 and the amp was awesome!

Sandra came after she got off work.

but didn't bring her guitar.......(the strings need changing)
                                                 ((she has since changed the strings))

poo

She is so talented,

 and she did play D's  tele,

 and she sounded AWESOME.

We cranked Knocking on Heavens Door and La Bamba and other stuff, and I let D play my bass.
     I sat back and watched and drooled.......
and smiled.......and drooled more.....

Nice toy.
The sound is so cool.

One of my favorite parts.

USA-USA-USA-USA-USA-USA!

Sandra can draw, paint, write, teach,
 play guitar(very well)

and she takes care of herself and others.
Yeah S !  Ring your bell !
I will have to share some
Sandra
  bones
 at a later time.
I have quiet a few!
We were
 in a band together
 for many years and have
 had a blast
 and
 were blasted
 a few times.
ha

We stayed late for us.
which was about 9:30-10:00.

We did stop and cook burgers between 5:30-6:30 or so,
(I was starving)
  I fixed a salad. (I tried a new dressing-Lite Red Wine Vinegrette)
 I liked it!
 The burgers were good too.
 R had a couple of motorcycle friends come by.
 Nice toys too.
I love that sound.....
R has a nice patio
 and the
           desert is nice
                       in the evenings.

We had FUN.
Thanks D and R
 for asking me to come out and play,
 and sharing your toys.

"For those about to Rock,
We salute you."





ma

Mom and Dad Monday

     I spent the day with M & D,
 and they seemed to be in a good mood.
Both of them.
I had put their bird feeder outside the window last week,
 and they have enjoyed it so much.
Dad cant see the birds, but he gets an eyewittness account of each and every bird that comes and goes.  It does get pretty active, especially when the birds start knowing the food is there, and you keep filling it.
Its really cute to listen to Mom describe whats going on at the bird feeder.
She uses alot of ooooos,
 eeeeeeees,
aaaaaaahs, and
 "oh those dang grackles!"
I had expressed my concern of Mom trying to fill the bird feeder herself.
Sure enough,
 she goes out side (she toolies in her wheel chair)
and discovers there is quite a steep grade on the sidewalk leading to the bird feeder.
She said
"Now, it scared me."
"I won't do that again."
ha
Good Lord.
She only has one hand that works.
The other is healing but still looks broke as hell,
(it looks great considering, and it is healing on time)
She said when she realized how fast she was rolling,
"I just reached for that brake and pushed on it and it stopped me."
I know it really did scare her,
because she really talked about it alot.

Thank you God for watching out for her....

There is a mystery at the nursing home.
Dad has lost his electric razor.
He thinks crazy Pearl came in and got it out of his drawer,
where he always keeps it.
He is probably right.
If thats true, there is no telling what she did with it.
He said he has woke up and she has been in the room.
Freaky.
She doesn't know what she is doing, or whose room she is in.
Sometimes she gets lost.
I will get him another electric razor.

Mom was also so happy about
Great Grand Child # 16.
Thats,  GREAT Grand Children.
wow


Little Kix, we are calling her right now,
(Jen starting referring to her as Kix, because she kicked so much!)
 was born to Jen and Royce(Jen is my niece)
early AM in New Mexico,
they couldn't make it to Texas!
Yeah New Mexico, We win again!
Jens Dr is in DCity.
This is #3 for Royce and Jen.
Welcome to our
 crazy family
little Kix.
We love you already!

Me and Mom

good laughing bones.

ma

Chores and Change

I have done nothing but work.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
Everywhere I look,
everything screams
WASH ME.
Like my Aunt Cecil used to  say,

"It's not a sin to be poor,
but it's a sin to be dirty."

(Thanks Z)

I bet thats why she moved to Colorado,
 out of this
damn
desert.
She lived by the river.
 Her yard and gardens
 were so green and pretty,
when I saw them.
I always thought about how she had to cross that
said river
to go
 to town,
and it was the same
 Arkansas River
that killed her beloved boy,
Billy,
 just after his HS Graduation.
An unfortunate accident that forever changed her.
Thats what loss does.
You become different.
The world becomes different as each soul enters and leaves.
I see it repeated in my family and friends lives
over and over.
It's not a conscious choice, it just happens.
You cant help it.
It needs no help.
It sounds bad, but it's really just how we are made.
You change when you get married.
You change when you have a baby.
(Your body changes more than your mind when you have a baby)
    at least it did for me....... ha
You change after you win first place.
You change when you come in last.
You change after you witnessed violence.
You change from 11 to 12
or 29-30, or 52-53, or 89-90.......
We change from the moment we are born.

Thats the real bone.

Cleaning,
 the act its self
 doesn't change much though....
(except for the addition of the magic eraser,
it is magic..really)

If you think about it...
cleaning is change...
from dirty to clean!
ha
It does some how
 give me
 a great sense of
 satisfaction
to have  a nice and clean what ever it is...

Friend M and I
 have a fantasy
of
having the dream job
 of being
 cleaning ladies
at the Rainbow Hilton in Honolulu.
Heaven on an island.
Cleaning
with the view of Diamond Head
 out of every window,
with each un-made bed
 and dirty trash can
 a vision of spectacular beauty.
Each room cleaned and changed.
ooooo la  la
Thro in some music,
what else do you need?
Good food, yes
it is on the island too.
Coconut shrimp..mmmm
I would,
 of course,
have a moon-light job
as drummer in a little trio
that played all the cool luaus.
I would fiddle in a country band on the side.
We would forever be changed from
desert rats,
to
island cleaning ladies.
ha
For now,
I've got to battle the desert.
I Thank God for the sunrise and sunsets,
in this dirty desert.

Sunrise

Same Sunrise

 Same day sunset

Same sunset moon

Same Verdell, with Clydee on the right

Same Scorpion, still alive in a jar on the snack bar

Same Same

Thankfully

ma

The Appointments

     One of the great things about
old people
is they are never late.
They are always early.
If they are late,
you know it warrants a phone call
just to see the cause.
Ya never know....

Last Thursday I had 2 appointments with old women
for pedicures and they were both on time.
Not even too early.
It turned out to be a tag-team as
Anne called Cloe
to head over
( she just lives 2 doors down from my shop)
 when I got finished with her.
It was a graceful exchange.
Anne still drives, but Cloe has a driver
and her "helper", Mary.

I had a client once, that would show up sometimes
3-4 hours early for her appointment.
I had my place inside a big Gym/Racketball fitness center,
and it opened at 5:00 am.
Her appointment would be at 11:00, and she would show up at 7:00.
The front desk would call and say, "Your appointment is here, did you forget?"
arggg,
Of course I didn't forget, she is just old and early.

Anne's pedicure went great.
Cloe's went well also.
I've known these women, or should I say, they have known me since I was born.
Our history is long and winding.
 Lots of love.
They invited me to lunch, but I said no thank-you,
I did have to get on my way after we were done.
They made me promise to go next time.
I made them both appointments for 6 weeks from now.

 Sunflower

It was awesome to have a money bone, well 2 of them.
They both wrote checks.
Cloe wrote in the memo/for line:  "toes".
I love it.
 I haven't made any bones in a while.
Nice.

ma

Scorpion Karma

     I caught a scorpion in the den a few weeks ago.
I put it in a jar and set in on the snack bar.
 I can't find one single thing that is good about a
 scorpion. I have tried.
I don't really hate any one or any thing,
but I think I must be close to hating scorpions.
A dark side of my personality must be expressing itself
because I love to shake and rattle the jar that I put this creature in.
He has had no food, or water or air for at least 4 weeks.
The jar has a rubber seal on it
 (peanut butter jar)
 and I have not opened it.
This ugly thing is still alive and still tries to get me.
 He gets mad when I shake the jar, and bounce him on the lid.
How long can this go on?
How long till lit dies?
I worry that something happens and the jar gets knocked off the snack bar
and the scorpion gets free
and
heads
straight
for
my
room.
The pay backs from this POW
(prisoner of war)
would be deadly.
oooooooooo...
I have quite a history with scorpions and their evil cousins the centipede and millipede.
The desert is a dangerous place.
It is home to a variety of bugs and creepers that are amazing.
I saw a lizard today.
Since moving into M & D's house-AKA-Centipede-ville,
I've warned J about leaving his pants on the floor.
He will have to learn the hard way.
Don't we all.
It won't be until after you have lived thru a scorpion or centipede in your pants when you put them on,
will you not leave your clothes on the floor.
Promise.
My smart chihuahua Harley Bean woke me up one nite to alert me to the centipede in the bed.
I can't see without my glasses, but I can see up close very well.
When I opened my eyes and focused them on my covers,
I saw a centipede a few inches from my face.
Man oh man,
its quite a rush,
quite a panic,
I THREW the covers off of me,  grabbed Harley and jumped up.
When I threw the covers, I threw the damn centipede too!
I never did find it again and I looked and looked.
Harley and I went and slept in my car.
It took me a while to be able to relax and sleep in the same room/bed.
I have lived with scorpions and centipedes for all my life.
Every house I have ever lived in, I have always killed a few scorpions.
I did live in a couple of apartments that didn't have them, but had plenty of other crawlies to take up the slack.
Centipedes will fake you out and make you think they are dead.
They will not move, or react to anything,
but leave the room,
and when you come back with your jar or weapon or trash can, or what ever your plan is to deal with this critter,
it will be gone.
It has happened to me several times.
Even when you think you have killed it.
No, it is still alive and crawling around your house, wounded and mad.

I think I will probably kill the scorpion this weekend.
I need to put us both out of our misery.
If that thing DID get loose,
it would find me and bite the crap out of me,
I just know it.
 What comes around goes around.
I've shaken that jar a bunch.

:-)



Jill McCasland

Such is Life

is an expression used by my friend M.
It does fit every situation.
The last few days have been very busy.
M & D are doing well.
I spent Tuesday with them.
Mom was shaky and sad when I got there and then
she was fine.
I worry she gets sad.
I am going to speak to the nurse to see if I can get her back in PT.
Physical therapy makes such a difference with her.
It improves her mind and attitude alot.

I have been feeling guilty again about leaving them.

I know its crazy, but I can't help it.
Its not so bad when Mom is feeling ok.
Dad's blood sugar has been good.
Lots of love going on.
Such is our life.

An old lady friend has been bugging me to give her a pedicure,
well, 2 pedicures,
her and Cloe.
I finally gave in and said I would do it Thurs. @ 10:00 am.
I haven't worked in many months,
so my shop was dusty and dirty.
I spent the better part of the day cleaning and doing laundry at my shop.
I love my place,
and my pedicure chair is such a luxury to have.
It's not real fancy, but I love it.
It is just right for me.
Crazy to think I got it on E-Bay for $250.00,
and had to pay $650.00 to get it shipped.

I know what your thinking.....
Yes, well the only reason I even bid on the damn thing was because I never thought I would get it, and I really didn't know that much about how E-bay worked and besides,  W lived within 2 hours of it, and he could just go get it and wrap it up and send it to me.(from Virginia to New Mexico)
 ha ha
  thats what he said.

Right.
He paid to have it crated and shipped for me .
He is such a good son.
I really do enjoy giving pedicures and massaging peoples feet.
The conversations are priceless.
Talk about good bones.
The things people tell me are all over the place.
I love conversation.
Some people are gifted at conversation and debate.
Some people are not.
There are only 2 kinds of people,
people who listen,
and
 people who wait to talk.
Listening is challenging.
Talking is not.
J is a talker. Definaltely not a listener.
Lips a flappin
I call him.


I cleaned my massage room.
I love my room.
It's very comfortable.

I have a client with a RX for massage 2x a week
I hope it works out  with the insurance. You never know.
 Its always changing.
D and several other clients are screaming at me to start massaging again.
Clean room
Clean table
I'm gettin there.
I do love what I do.
I have missed it.

The wind was horrible again today.
There were alot of grass fires.
I could see the smoke.
 Its kinda hard to see in the picture, but that cloud is smoke!

It scares me.
J and I made a plan in case we have to evacuate in a hurry.
The main thing would be to get the animals out.
J would pick Spur up and put her in his truck.
He would get Porsha, Sha Marie and Hop-Sing in the big crate and in the truck.
I would get Verdells collar and leash on him and get him in my truck. I would continue and get Little Red and Wolfy in the crate and in the truck.
We would then catch if we could, Bonnie, Clydee,Shaggy, and Feona and get them in the trucks.
J would open the gates to the horses and let them out.
I decided I would not turn my chickens out as that would be certain death, and maybe the fire would skip over them, who knows, but letting them out is not the answer. God forbid this ever happens.
 If I'm here by myself, I would just do the best I can.
Our other priorities would be our guitars and pictures.
My first to grab would be my 2008 Rickenbacker Bass
and my telecaster 6 string, and my camera and my mac.
I have most of our important papers in a fire proof box, so..
I pray it never happens.

Such is Life.......

Happy Birthday

Call him weird or cute,
or choose the word you like best,
J likes to sew,
he likes to iron clothes,
he loves clothes,
he once owned a western wear clothing store,
(he is a real cowboy you know)
as I write,
he is making a new phone case for his new phone,
and he INSISTED
we get a new washer and dryer.
He had the money for it.
It was his birthday.
We are Americans.

The pair I have been using were older than our grown children.

They still worked, kinda.

They are very clean.

They are Moms.

Notice even the peel off instructions are still on the top of the washer.

I can find an emotional attachment to anything.
I was sad when the new machines came.
All I could do
is see my Mom standing in front of that damn machine for the last 40 years.
Now, I am getting rid of them.
Out with the old
In with the new!

Lord have mercy.

My sadness quickly dissipated when I saw the oil and water leaking under the washer,(I already knew about this leak, as I had cleaned up the oil before, it had gotten much worse)
and yes, we were wasting a lot of electricity because the dryer didn't really dry the first or second time through the cycle. And yes, the new ones are pristine and made in Kentucky! Go USA!

Support your local country.

I think J had a good day.
They gave him a cake at work

Anyone and everyone that matters to him called him,
so he was happy.

I made him a pumpkin pie,

 and I was gonna make stuffed jalapeno's
but it got late and he had a few calls from work,
so I will do them this weekend.
We went up to the townhouse and changed the water from tree to tree.
It was a beautiful night.
I gifted J with a new guitar tuner and a new pair of cargo shorts, and 2 new t-shirts.
Its not everyday you become 54 years old.
you only do this once in your life.

Happy Birthday Muffadee!

The Nurse

came running out of Mom and Dads room
as I came down the hall.
I was scared.
Bad.
"Get her out of there" she yelled at me as she ran by,
"I've already called the ambulance!"
"What's going on?" I ask.
No one responds to me.

She runs past me and as I get to M & D's room,
Mom is sitting in her chair, braced, stoic and pale, shaking and scared.
Dad is having some kind of spell, in some kind of seizure,
 he is still concise,
 but whaling violently
 back and forth and
 Round and round in his chair.
 Throwing up, his eyes rolling back in his head, he is gasping for breath, he is pale, he is making wild sounds.
He can't breathe.
  It's awful.

They have matching Lazy-Boys
sitting side by side with a rectangle table
 between them.

There were 3 nurses trying to keep him off the floor and help him thru this.
Dad is big and strong, they had their hands full.
Mom was so pitiful and scared.
My heart breaks.
It hurts.

I found out later
SHE kept Dad in his chair by herself
until the nurses got there,
which she called for them.
She also had called me earlier to tell me Dad wasn't feeling very well.
I am, once again, so proud of her.
I feel like one of those parents that go on TV with their little 2 year old
 that called 911 by her
 big girl self
 and saved their loved ones life.
 It is pretty amazing, given her frail condition.
 She truly is the toughest little woman I've ever known.
She has always remained calm
no matter the
 horrible realities  we've lived through as a family.
Mom has never been a drama queen,
she is a
Real Queen-of our Family.
A Real Lady.
A Real Good Wife.
A Real Good Mom.

I quickly got Moms wheelchair out and tried to get her in it.
We got out in the hall and I tried to find somewhere to park her
that she wouldn't get in the way.  Things were in motion all around us.
Mom was crying, I was crying too.
I had to go back into the room with Dad.
I told Mom to stay put, and I went back in.


I always call Dad, Dad.
I haven't called him "Daddy" in years and years.
I don't know why I stopped calling him "Daddy",
because that is all I called him as a child.
  Maybe I just grew up.
I didn't make a conscious choice to not  call him Daddy,
it was just kinda an evolution.
When I saw Dad trying so hard to breathe,
violently thrashing back and forth,
pale, throwing up,
the word
"Daddy!"
came flying out of my mouth like an arrow
straight to him.
For an instant,
 I felt like a scared little girl
 screaming out for her Daddy in danger.
Dad heard me and  he looked up and kinda took a weird kinda breath and said "Well what are you doing?  Well good, good"
Then he reared back again.
"Lets try to get him to the bed!" the nurse said forcefully.
I grabbed the back of his jeans/belt and held on and lifted.
We got him in bed.
He was still throwing up, and kinda choking all at the same time.
Gasping and spewing.
As  bad as it was,
 it was somehow better
after Dad responded to me.
I wanted to tell Mom he was better
so I went  back out into the hall.
Mom and I sat together and watched the ambulance pull up.
Somehow things slowed down a little.
It seemed as if the ambulance attendants were in the room
a very long time.
I had taken Dads watch off of him.
He scratched his hands up with all the thrashing around he was doing.
They started an IV, gave him nitro and I don't know what all.
Dad settled down, but was still making crazy sounds.
He became more and more coherent but still not well at all.
They loaded him in the ambulance,
took of and  pulled up about 20 feet
 and then stopped.
Huh?
 What are they doing?
We were getting concerned,
 and about the time I go out to check on whats up,
they take off.
Mom wants to go to the hospital,
but the nurses try to talk her out of it.
She is having no part of it,
she is polite, and says,
"Yes, I know there is nothing I can do, but at least I can do that closer to him than from here."
 " I want to be close to him" she said.
I stepped outside to call my brother.
I started crying pretty hard when I got alone.
I get so mad at myself when I do that.
Crying all the damn time.
Everyone knows what a bawl bag I am.
My brother said he would be there asap.
I called my other brother.
I know he lives too far to come right away, but he needs to know what is going on.
We get done and I get Mom loaded up and we head over to the hospital.

Its cloudy outside, but not too cold.
The hospital is not far, just a short drive across town.
We get inside the ER, and Angela,
a childhood friend of my nieces from E-Town is the nurse attending the window.  She is awesome.
Her Dad,
Joey,
taught me how to play a walking country bass line on the electric bass.
 The rest (as they say) is history.

She gives us her love and concern and goes back to see what she can find out about Dad.
We wait.
Angela returns and tells us that they are still doing some tests, but the initial heart test show his heart is fine.
 What relief, but what the hell is wrong?
She tells us we can go back and set with him as soon as they are thru.  She is about to leave, as it is her quitting time.  She is going home.

Here comes the jealous bone again.

Going home......I want to too.

My mind wanders easily to all the chores at home to do......

"Yall can go on back now" says the new nurse at the window.
She gets up and opens the door for us.
 It has a debt card type key swipe on it.

We find Dad in trauma room #1
hooked up to the BP/heart monitor.
He looks so much better,
he knows us.

 We are both immediately relieved.

A nurse comes in with warm blankets for him and tell us his blood sugar level was 34, and then dropped to 0.  He has a urinary tract infection, and his heart and other vital signs are all normal. They are still waiting on some more results, so we can sit and relax and talk for a while.
Good.

My brother and L show up.
They see classmates of theirs from E-town in the ER
waiting for news on their mom.

world so small.......

I let them go in to stay with Dad.
Mom stays and I go out.
I call W and tell him what is happening.
I send M a text.
I try and communicate with all those on the
"List".
My crazy family,
 we do kinda have a system of who calls who
when events are happening
and  need to be spread around.
Some how we make it work.
(I have however decided we will never again try and draw names for Christmas with the Opt/out if don't want to gift clause. It doesn't work.)

In a little while,
brother P and wife L come out and say Dad is being released to go home.
???
Are they sure?
I still haven't talked to a Dr.
A Nurse Practitioner, as wonderful as they are, is not a Dr.
Dad has HIS Dr., and  he needs to see HIM.
I have learned to take your healthcare into your own hands.
bla bla bla bla bla
They say just what you want to hear.
OK.
I will find him.
Well, he is gone for the day so try tomorrow.
            Come on.
arggggggg

In the mean time, Dad is ready to go.
HA
We get out to the car  and the nurse realizes they didn't take his IV out.
Lord.
She runs back in the hospital and comes back out to the parking lot and takes the IV out with Dad still in the wheelchair.
You gotta love small towns.
Brother P and L took Dad,
I had Mom in the truck with me.
We head back.
Everyone is so glad to see us when we return.
It makes you feel good.
You can tell when people are genuine.
The people that care for M & D,
are  good people
they are real genuine.
They are full of love.
I thank God for them everyday.

Dad was hungry and ready to get some real clothes on.
Mom was exhausted and wanting me to spend the night.
They decided to eat in the room, so we got their meals ordered.
P & L left.
I didn't get out of there until about 9-9:30 pm.
It was a long,
 unrushed,
 quiet,
 dark,
 drive
home.
I didn't turn on the radio
I just couldn't process any more of any thing.


I'm really trying to live in the moment.